Once upon a time, in a place called Warriorsland, a friendly yet expensive place in the western lands of the NBA-topia, there was a team called the Warriors. The Warriors played the game of basketball, and they weren’t so very good at it.
Previously, they offered the game’s most exciting brand of basketball. The people of Warriorsland whooped and hollered in excitement whenever the Good Sirs Mullin, Hardaway and Richmond bravely took the court each night. But, when the Evil King Cohan ascended to the throne of Warriorsland, with his minions, Lords Robert Rowell and Garry St. Jean, in tow, the team and its loyal supporters had fallen into a dark, depressive state and somehow kept finding ways to dig the hole in which they found themselves deeper. Warriorsland, and all who hailed from it, became the laughingstock of NBA-topia.
For countless years, when it came time to recognize NBA-topia’s best players each season with All-Star selections, the Warriors were nowhere to be found, and rightfully so. They were that terrible. The good people of Warriorsland longed and longed for better, more prosperous times. They deserved better, but their hopes repeatedly went unanswered.
But then, a light at the end of the tunnel. One by one, St. Jean, Rowell and King Cohan were either banished to Narnia or succumbed to the potent forces of good and righteousness.
King Lacob took the throne after the Great Bidding War of 2010, when he successfully fought off Larry Ellison the Great Oracle and his armada of giant space boats. King Lacob soon after appointed Lord Bob Myers as his Hand of the King.
Though the prosperous times the hopeful folk of Warriorsland longed for were near, it wasn’t so immediately apparent. The Warriors continued to struggle even after the change on the throne, and the citizens of Warriorsland grew increasingly restless. King Lacob received a bitter lesson of “uneasy lies the head that wears the crown” when he was attacked with angry and loud noises from the good people of Warriorsland during the coronation ceremony of Good Sir Mullin.
But not long after, the Warriors turned a corner thanks to meteoric rise of the baby-faced but deadly Right Honorable Sir Curry and the clever planning of Lord Myers. Triumphant music by the court jester Flo Rida was frequently played in celebration after games. Doves and eagles and other glorious, majestic birds were frequently released into the vast night sky in wake of triumph. Yes, prosperity and respectability had returned to Warriorsland.
And yet, despite all his decorations from battle and praise from outside observers, the Right Honorable Sir Curry was denied a position on last year’s All-Star team, much to the disappointment of his loyal admirers in Warriorsland. But the Warriors’ All-Star fruitlessness was no more when Sir David Lee, who despite his defensive deficiencies was still a noble player, was appointed to the team in recognition of his valuable contributions.
All was rectified today, however, when the Right Honorable Sir Curry, ever the fearless leader and protector of all in Warriorsland (they shall never forget the time he took on the formidable Garden Dragon of Madison Square by himself), was not only named an All-Star for the first time but named an All-Star starter. Even better, he finished with the most votes of any backcourt player in the game. It’s as sure a sign as any that the Warriors, now one of the best teams in the western lands of NBA-topia, are no longer the laughingstock they once were and have now officially earned the respect they have for so long sought.
There is no “the end” to this story because the story is not over. The future is unwritten and has yet to unfold. You’ll just have to keep watching on your own to find out if this story, if the Warriors and the good people of Warriorsland, gets a happily ever after.
Some notable tweets:
Wow. Thanks 2 everyone that supported and that voted for me. Amazing feeling and can't wait to represent my teammates down in NO. #dubnation
— Stephen Curry (@StephenCurry30) January 24, 2014
Steph Curry is 1st Warrior to start All-Star Game since Latrell Sprewell. (via @ESPNStatsInfo) » pic.twitter.com/porW7iiARM
— SportsCenter (@SportsCenter) January 24, 2014
Last time Warriors had different all stars in consecutive years was 92/93 (Hardaway/Mullin) and 93/94 (Sprewell).
— Kyle Bonagura (@BonaguraESPN) January 24, 2014
All-Star starters:
Western Conference
Kobe Bryant, L.A. Lakers
Stephen Curry, Golden State
Kevin Durant, Oklahoma City
Blake Griffin, L.A. Clippers
Kevin Love, Minnesota
Eastern Conference
Carmelo Anthony, New York
Paul George, Indiana
Kyrie Irving, Cleveland
LeBron James, Miami
Dwyane Wade, Miami
Full voting results:
Western Conference
Frontcourt
1. Kevin Durant (OKC) 1,396,294
2. Blake Griffin (LAC) 688,466
3. Kevin Love (Min) 661,246
4. Dwight Howard (Hou) 653,318
5. LaMarcus Aldridge (Por) 609,172
6. Tim Duncan (SA) 492,657
7. Anthony Davis (NO) 286,247
8. Andre Iguodala (GS) 266,611
9. DeMarcus Cousins (Sac) 255,005
10. Pau Gasol (LAL) 247,323
11. David Lee (GS) 232,210
12. Dirk Nowitzki (Dal) 201,873
13. Chandler Parsons (Hou) 174,512
14. Omer Asik (Hou) 130,344
15. Andrew Bogut (GS) 127,947
Backcourt
1. Stephen Curry (GS) 1,047,281
2. Kobe Bryant (LAL) 988,884
3. Chris Paul (LAC) 804,309
4. Jeremy Lin (Hou) 628,818
5. James Harden (Hou) 470,381
6. Russell Westbrook (OKC) 317,338
7. Damian Lillard (Por) 280,966
8. Tony Parker (SA) 258,751
9. Klay Thompson (GS) 162,984
10. Ricky Rubio (Min) 124,230
Eastern Conference
Frontcourt
1. LeBron James (Mia) 1,416,419
2. Paul George (Ind) 1,211,318
3. Carmelo Anthony (NYK) 935,702
4. Roy Hibbert (Ind) 524,809
5. Chris Bosh (Mia) 406,867
6. Kevin Garnett (Bkn) 209,398
7. Joakim Noah (Chi) 181,145
8. Andre Drummond (Det) 163,798
9. Tyson Chandler (NYK) 137,512
10. Luol Deng (Cle) 121,754
11. Jeff Green (Bos) 121,040
12. Carlos Boozer (Chi) 103,502
13. David West (Ind) 95,363
14. Paul Pierce (Bkn) 95,034
15. Josh Smith (Det) 75,433
Backcourt
1. Dwyane Wade (Mia) 929,542
2. Kyrie Irving (Cle) 860,221
3. John Wall (Was) 393,129
4. Derrick Rose (Chi) 359,546
5. Ray Allen (Mia) 250,909
6. Rajon Rondo (Bos) 174,654
7. Lance Stephenson (Ind) 148,382
8. DeMar DeRozan (Tor) 131,228
9. George Hill (Ind) 129,533
10. Deron Williams (Bkn) 126,423
[NBA.com]
